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Every bloke knows how the relationship shuffle works. It’s usually a 4-step process, right?

There is the initial hook-up, which moves into the casual get-together phase, which quickly transitions into a full blown relationship, and it either lasts or it doesn’t (if it doesn’t, step 4 is the ugly break up). Do you want to know why 99% of break ups don’t move straight from hook-up to break up? It’s because you don’t know enough about each other, yet, to make that call.  It’s only when you really start getting to know someone that their annoying habits and strange personality traits slowly rise to the top like filthy foam scum in a washing up sink. I’ve highlighted 34 annoying habits most men are guilty of (including myself) that might well see a few blokes getting their asses dumped prematurely. Keen on a particular bird and want to have a chance of making it work? Try and avoid the following:-

  • Getting way too boozed at a social gathering and making a complete ass of yourself (Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde Syndrome)
  • Getting properly boozed and spending the night hugging the toilet…more than twice a year
  • Spending more time with your mates at a social gathering than you do with your date
  • Saying you are going to book dinner and then you don’t
  • Peeing on the toilet seat
  • Leaving the toilet seat up
  • Eating with your mouth open
  • Not replacing the toilet roll when you’ve used the last sheet for your morning No 2
  • Leaving shaving scum in the bathroom sink
  • Using the last sliver of shower soap and not replacing it
  • Accepting strange female Facebook friend invites
  • Saying you’ll be home in 20 minutes & then getting home 3 hours later (whatever your excuse is, it’s not gonna fly!)
  • Intimating that her mother might pass as her older sister
  • Leaving clothes and especially your dirty underwear lying around, like it’s a university dorm room
  • Stacking dirty dishes in the sink like you are trying to break a Jenga world record
  • Busting burps and farts like you did when you where 13 years old
  • Talking about your ex like you are still an item
  • Talking about your penis like it’s a mate of yours
  • Talking about your undying love for your mother (nobody likes a mommy’s boy)
  • Talking about how successful you are
  • Talking about how much money you have
  • Taking about your sexual conquests
  • Driving like your are auditioning for Fast & Furious 8
  • Driving pissed
  • Saying you are going to do something and not following through with it
  • Hogging the television with your sports viewing schedule the entire weekend
  • Never offering to do the laundry…any housework for that matter
  • Not helping out when it comes to dinner (every dude at the very least can make a salad)
  • Never offering to pick up a bill when you are out
  • Never putting yourself out when you are around her mates
  • Leaving the car with just enough fuel in it to turn the engine over
  • Getting a drink without offering her one
  • Getting your car cleaned without offering to get hers done
  • Spending date night on your phone WhatsApping your mates and catching live sports results

Now that I have a look at this list, I’m wondering how my wife has put up with me for so long?

Truth is, it’s probably not one annoying habit that ends a relationship, but a combination of misdemeanours.

Got any annoying habits you think women find tough to live with? Leave your comments below

SLEB

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